So Good It Hurts

Romans 8; Numbers 13 & 14

I have never heard of a dry battlefield that bore no sweat, tears and blood stains. No one is escaping this world without pain. The uncertainty in the midst of urgency cries alone at midnight for fear of no way out. In my own actions, my spirit becomes faint and I thirst for Him. My sin is ever before me and seeps from my flesh as I await His holy kiss. When life gets like this, I occasionally forget what He began in me with faith in my endurance. Then, when I have come near hopelessness, His power sprints through my blood and it revives me to remind me that His grace is enough and there is work to be done.

No one can tell me that God is not real. No one can convince me to believe that I survived misery alone. Supernatural miracles attest to the power I received when I spoke Christ’s name. Alone I would have crumbled, but, because of Him, I endured. God’s grace was sufficient through temptation and disappointments. When I was weak, He made me run. When I was in need, He provided for me, but when I asked Him, perpetually, to take this cup from me, He would not. At first, I admit, I felt betrayed, but He reminded me of His love as He whispered and awakened my spirit. He reminded me that He has always been faithful, and His gift to me requires my faith in return. Therefore, before I rejoiced, I believed that He was present with me and I was convinced that His promise was real. Before He blessed me, He humbled me. I was compelled to seek Him, even though my heart was weary. I know He heard my cry because He rescued me.

I can not comprehend my praise unless I have been drenched in sorrow. My best praise is accompanied by a testimony. My true praise tells how I was mocked, lied on, and forced to my knees with my fingers clutched and my eyes wet looking toward heaven. My praise is a witness to the chains that coiled my wrists with strong embrace. My praise tells strangers and confidents that I survived by His grace; my worship tells God that I am grateful that He allowed me to seek His face. Paul spoke proudly of his prison confinement and boldly of his sufferings. He saw past the injustice and into the heart of God. He knew that his testimony could introduce salvation to the most doubtful soul if he remained faithful. Paul understood that his pain was about more than him.

When we suffer, it may not be all about ourselves, but our suffering does not go unnoticed. If disobedience reaps destruction; then, remaining righteous, even through the fire, reaps blessings. In John 15:7, Jesus said, “If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given [to] you.” Jesus’ name gives access to anything that is good. (Psalms 34:10) While you’re going through, remaining may not seem like the best idea based on what you are feeling. Unfortunately, we trigger so many different emotions from our thoughts. A lot of times, our actions are based on our emotions rather than logical reasoning or what we know. It is important to know who God is and what He has promised those who love Him, because once you know the truth, you can stop focusing on the chaos and start expecting the best. Jesus prompted us to remain in Him because He knew it was going to get hard. Not only did He know it, but He experienced it. God is simply asking for our loyalty. He is saying, “No matter what you are going through right now, and regardless of how you are feeling right now, continue to seek me, stick close to me, and do not deny me, because, when it’s all over, I will not deny you.”

Because our thoughts have such great influence over our minds, I want to remind you, like Paul and Timothy reminded the church of Philippi, to think on things that are true, noble, righteous, pure, lovely, and admirable. (Philippians 4:8-9) Even more, I encourage you to meditate on God’s faithfulness to you and the promise that He has already set aside for you, should you choose to follow Him. Remember the time He spent on the cross as He suffered unjustly. Think about the shame His enemies and murderers must have felt when he left his clothes behind in the tomb and departed the earth and entered into glory with all power in His hands. Understand that the God who gave up His son for our souls’ sake will also give us all things freely with grace. (Romans 8:32) Contemplate on what an honor it is to be called a child of God, thus a co-heir with Christ. (Romans 8:17) Then you will understand how you suffer in order to share in Christ’s glory. It is foolish to think that we will share His glory without understanding His affliction first. Anyone can abide with Him when life is well, but when persecution and terror bombard us, God will reveal to us what He has known all along: just how much we love Him. If we can be faithful through our tests and trials, we prove to God and ourselves that we can be steadfast when we have the ability to do even greater works than Christ did when He was on earth. (John 14:12-14)

Therefore, suffering was not meant to break us, but to make us stronger and ready to bear lasting fruit. (John 15:16) We suffer to be made in the image of Christ. (Romans 8:29) In our suffering we should be provoked to praise and rejoicing for the glory that awaits us. The question is: “Do you have the courage to reap your harvest?”

It is hard to conceive that there is glory ahead of you, because you have been in the wilderness for so long. It is not that God abandoned you, because He has been providing your needs all along. It is the wait that makes our knees buckle and the disappointments that make us uncertain which we call suffering, but God calls it preparation. I have learned that I panic when things don’t go my way, but perhaps God is waiting for me to get to a place where I am calm through my storm. It is possible that He wants to reveal to me my strengths to ensure that I am ready for what He has ahead of me. I believe He even wants to reveal His amazing grace to us so much that we have the courage to step out on faith when the time presents itself.

Through our tests and trials we are given our own stories to reflect on, but God was also kind in sharing the Israelites’ journey to their promised land. It was a blessing and a miracle that they were delivered from Egypt’s bondage, but Israel had their own idea of freedom, and it looked nothing like the wilderness. When the Israelites were loosed from bondage, they weren’t satisfied. God had put them through situations that tested their faith and Israel was failing. They focused on the difficulties, such as their need for food and water and the tedious journey, rather than recognizing the provision and faithfulness of God. Israel was so dissatisfied and ungrateful that they regretted their independence. They believed that it would be better to suffer under the Pharaoh’s authority than to be secure in God’s grace. Their walk with God required faith, but they had none. No matter how bad a situation looked, or how impossible it seemed to achieve victory, Israel had to learn to trust God—that was the lesson and the revelation they needed in order to succeed. Israel had to understand that they weren’t suffering at all; in fact, they had to realize that they were blessed.

            It is important to be patient and know that we are blessed in any condition. There is no need to worry when we are in the will of God. The perseverance required to endure this experience is necessary to build character. This character made of hope is the person we need to be when it comes time to possess our promise. The old character, before the wilderness, didn’t have enough courage to see past the obstacle and through the eyes of God to receive the blessing. The old character couldn’t appreciate the blessing or bless the world with the story of how we got through. Remember that God’s promise to Jacob was to bless the world through his descendants, (Genesis 28:14) and, if that was going to be done, Israel was going to need a testimony.  God also promised Jacob, “I will give you and your descendants the land on which you are lying.” (Genesis 28:13) It was the suffering that they had conquered that allowed Joshua the son of Nun and Caleb the son of Jephunneh to move fearlessly into their land “flowing with milk and honey.” Before the Israelites had possessed their land, God told Moses to send some men to explore the land of Canaan so that they could see the promise ahead of time. I believe that we all want to see what is ahead of us. If we could only get a peak at what God has for us we can be more confident in our struggles and more fearless through our journey. When the men from every tribe stepped into the hill country to explore the land they saw that the land was good. The men came back and reported to Moses:

"We went into the land to which you sent us, and it does flow with milk and honey! Here is its fruit. ²⁸ But the people who live there are powerful, and the cities are fortified and very large. We even saw descendants of Anak there. ²⁹ The Amalekites live in the Negev; the Hittites, Jebusites and Amorites live in the hill country; and the Canaanites live near the sea and along the Jordan."

Numbers 13: 27-29

So it seems there were some good news and some bad news. The land was plentiful and everything that God had promised them, but they had also noticed some fortified cities that seemed impossible to conquer. Once again, the Israelites were being challenged and they began to complain and regret their independence. They had disregarded the good land that God had given them and they were defeated before they even tried to possess their land. The Israelites saw their blessing and believed it was real, but they lacked the faith they needed to be victorious. They complained and doubted that they were able to defeat the cities. God had shown them his power throughout their journey to this place, yet they still protested and wished to go back to Egypt.

            How can we expect to be victorious if we don’t know who we are and the favor we have from God? Faith is acting on what you believe. You can not succeed simply because of what you know is truth. Imagine how disappointed God was. God had brought Israel through so many trials and preserved their lives for years, yet they still didn’t have enough faith to act on what they believed. Only a few of them had enough courage to step out on faith. These few were able to remember what God had brought them through before and they were sure that God would do it again. The problem with lacking faith is that without it we can not expect anything from God. (James 1:7) When God became angry with Israel for their doubt, He gave them exactly what they had believed in their hearts. They believed they would die where they were and they did. God also became angry with the men who came back from the land and spread a bad report. God sent the leaders of Israel to see that the land was good, not to spread doubt throughout the people’s hearts. Joshua and Caleb focused on what God had given them, rather than on the challenge, and they were able to lead the courageous Israelites into the land. Those men who spread doubt throughout the community were struck down and died of a plague. When Moses told the people what happened to their leaders, they finally were remorseful and promised to move toward their new land, but it was too late. They had already denied God and God was no longer with them. When they went up against the cities, they were attacked and beaten.

            Many of the Israelites didn’t learn anything from their suffering. They had never received the revelation they needed in order to live in their land. Their hearts were hardened and they couldn’t comprehend what a blessing it was to be in the hands of God. Imagine if Jesus had been too afraid to go to Calvary. What would our lives be like today? Jesus knew how important it was to be obedient and trust God. He believed that His suffering would only be for a time and would offer salvation to a dying world. It wasn’t enough for Jesus to believe, though. He had to act on His belief, take up His cross, and die for us. Instead of focusing on His death and the pain He would endure, He focused on His promise. He knew that all power would be in His name and that in His name people would be healed, delivered and set free; therefore, He stepped out on faith and trusted God to help Him overcome this world. Before Christ died, He had a testimony that He pleased God with His faith. He had performed miracles with God’s power and suffered through people’s unbelief, yet He remembered His promises even through his turmoil.

            Romans 8:28-30 clarifies some things. One, God has a purpose for our lives, no doubt. We were predestined for some meaningful moment. Two, God’s desire is that we be conformed to the image of Christ. God wants us to walk like, talk like and live like Christ; then, we can be sons and daughters of God and thus siblings to Christ. Three, once we are called and receive our calling we go through a period where we are justified. To justify is to make right. This is important to understand because once we decide to live for Christ we go through a period of tribulation which is necessary to justify us so that we are prepared for the purpose he called us for. The last sentence in verse 30 is “whom he justified, them he also glorified.” God’s desire is to glorify us that we might glorify him. Verse 18 of Romans 8 assures us that our sufferings are not in vain, but that glory is to come!
           

Knowing this now, I can suffer, because I know that suffering has the power to set the captive free. It is easy to give into feeling sorry for yourself. This is something my grandmother Bea has always told me. When I graduated college, I was looking forward to working, paying off debt, having my independence and worshipping my God the way He called me to worship Him. Things didn’t work out the way I had planned right away. The Great Recession had left so many people jobless. I and many of my classmates were unable to find employment and wondered how we would pay off our loans and debts. My future wasn’t looking bright, in fact, I was becoming despondent. Some nights I cried. Some days I rejoiced. Soon, I realized that God just wanted me to trust Him-- not just when life was easy, but whenever life was hard and nothing seemed right. I was on fire for God and so grateful that He had set me free when I graduated, but when all of the chaos came into my life it was time for me to show God how serious I was about him. I refused to miss out on my blessings like the doubtful Israelites. God was in control and I was going to be a witness to how He sustains His children even when they’re bound in chains and heartache. As I waited for God to bless me and remove me from my dry place, I was changing. I was becoming the woman He wanted me to be. I believe that He kept me out of the world to have my attention. God had things to show me and promises to tell me.

            Saints, we must endure. We must keep our minds on the kingdom and kingdom business. What has God called you to do? Seek him and find out and keep him first. Do not care for the things of this world. Count your blessings with thanksgiving unto the Lord. Focus on him and the work that needs to be done for the kingdom. There is no need to worry; he will supply our needs and give us the desires of our hearts. (Philippians 4:4-9 & Luke 22:28-31 & John 4:31-38) We need only to know that our blessing is so good, that it hurts.